The MTA will pay you to lose your Metrocard

I lose my unlimited MetroCard whenever I am about to skip town.

The MTA pays to do it.

The benefit of unlimited cards are that you are buying bulk, so it costs less per ride than if you had purchased rides individually.

But when you go out of town for a week or two, it's like paying for an all-you-can-eat dinner and then not shoveling grub into your gob like a competitive eater.

My spirit animal cries whenever you throw out leftovers.

If you didn't use up your MetroCard before heading on vacation, can you get some money back? Yes, but only this once twice.

The MTA will compensate you at a rate of $3.74/day if you report your MetroCard lost/stolen - no questions asked - twice per year.

"I'm sorry, good Sir. It looks like I've lost my MetroCard, again."

 
Only unlimited cards get the deal. The first refund is free and the second costs a $5 "admin" fee. You don't need a receipt but you do need the debt/credit card that was used to buy it. The MTA credits your account within a day.

The folks who do the refunding are around during working hours at 718 330-1234.

Outside of those hours, leave a detailed message. But don't expect a prompt response; a worker responded to my voice message two months later.

Happy travels.

Thanks for paying for all of my food, PayPal.

There is such thing as a free lunch...and breakfast, and dinner, thanks to a business plan I don't quite understand at PayPal.

 

If you download its free app, you can use free coupons ("Offers") that give you store credit at various businesses. That's right. It's not a discount. You get credited ($5 or $10) towards your purchase, even if your purchase is less than that amount. What the Free! Holy Moolah!

A quick Googling didn't yield any news article on this, which is surprising, because eating out is expensive in NYC.

Don't have a smartphone? Sorry, folks. You'll have to pay full price for that bread.

Perhaps, the aim is a word of mouth campaign (you're welcome, PayPal?). 

Maybe PayPal hopes people will like it, and then learn to use the app without the free credit, in a feat of Pavlovian genius.

I'll admit: The first stage in operant conditioning has been successful, PayPal. Oh the complicated routes I travel, panting and salivating at your free offers at restaurants, bars, groceries, and creperies around NYC.

Me (pictured) on my way to lunch.

And the second stage has been a success, too: I follow your command to say, "I'm paying with PayPal" to the person at the cash register and anyone else who can hear those words. I say it proudly and loudly because it's free. Who knows if the other customers know that.

It's not so bad jumping through some hoops for a free lunch.

But what's the end game here, PayPal? I've spent around $150 of PayPal's money on lunch and dinner over the last month. 

Today, I've already gotten $15 worth of free grub:

• A frozen Amy's Mattar Paneer
• A Reeds Spiced Apple Ginger Brew - Holy moly! That's good stuff 
• A medium chai latte
• Siggis, a delicious Icelandic yogurt that always reminds me of Ziggy, the computer system on Quantum Leap.

Ziggy ran on a smart phone, too.

I feel like I'm winning. But that is what a good manipulator wants. 

My guard is up, PayPal. (shudder) I hope you haven't already gotten to me.